Monday, April 21, 2008

Fossil Guy's Birthday


It's Fossil Guy's Birthday today. He would have been 74. I thought he would live to be 90 and beyond. I'll be thinking of him all day. Happy Birthday, Fossil Guy. Here's to you, wherever you are.

Funny Isn't It?




This is an ad that I found in the Sunday paper coupon insert. The part that got my attention is "We buy energy credits!" Yahoo--Yippee!! Good for you! Are we supposed to buy this product because this company buys energy credits, even if it clogs our arteries and makes us fat? Hey, we buy energy credits, so it's okay and you can eat our product without guilt! I think we're going to see lots more of this. On the one hand it's great that saving the environment has suddenly become the "cool" thing to do, but I think it's little late for cool. Funny? Not very.

I hope others watched the debate the other night, the most recent one of many, many debates between Obama and Hillary, so they understand this cartoon, which I found to be right on the money and hilarious! I kept wondering when Charles Gibson and my favorite news guy, George Stephanopolis, would get to the real issues--turns out they didn't get there until question number 16! For shame! Funny, but not really.

Since we're talking funny, here is a politically WAY-incorrect joke I heard BJ Novak (writer for and actor {Ryan} in The Office) say on Bob River's radion show on KZOK this morning:

"Battered women sound so delicious, but it doesn't make it right!"

He also said, "If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I'd choose living...."

Now that's funny!



Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Dreamy Wednesday

This day began with a dream that showed just how anxious I am about what we might run into on our trip to Greece next week. Here's the dream:

I'm in New Jersey. I have just been "dropped off" there somehow, after missing a connection to a flight. This New Jersey place is strange. It's very little, a small town, like it's in the boonies of NJ, with lots of Mexicans around. There is a grocery store/bar/drugstore establishment that I go into looking for ways to get on another flight. A woman who has been manning the drugstore part of this place says, "Come on over here and I'll take care of you", as she leaves one counter and goes to another, which is apparently the place she can take care of me. She says, "Yeah, I can put you on another flight, no problem." I ask her when it will be leaving and she says offhandedly, "A couple of days." I am appalled! Horrified! I have to stay in this strange, little NJ town for a "couple of days"?! I walk out of the establishment in shock and run into three other women who are in my same boat. These woman are tall and veeerrry wide, but they are women who understand my predicement and they're nice, so we decide to go together to get something to eat and talk over the problem. We get a taxi--yes, there is a taxi in this odd little town--and all four of us get in the back seat. I am squished by them to the point that my cheeks (on my face) are so pushed together that my mouth is in a pucker! But we get to a restaurant which is, predictably, Mexican. I usually don't have anything against Mexican food, in fact we eat quite a lot of it, but this restaurant looked like a place that hadn't seen a food inspection in a looooong time. So, in addition, to having to spend "a couple of days" in this town, I am worried that I might have to spend a couple of days in this town with loose bowels. While I am eating the gray, porky, fatty, suspect food I look out the window at the street. It is very colorful, lots of signs, people dressed in vibrant reds, yellows, greens, blues, there seems to be a parade of some kind--and then a bus goes by hung with skulls--skulls dangling on every square inch--a Day of the Dead spectacle. All I can think of in my panic is that I have to call my husband--he can get me out of here--he will call who ever it takes to get me a flight out of this place, this dangerous, scary place. That's when I woke up. I was still in New Jersey, but at least my dream had allowed me a plan of action. Where is Tony Soprano when you need him?

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A couple of hours after the dream I was in the dentist chair looking through an "O" magazine and waiting for Dr. Redd to replace a worn out filling. He had already told me that he didn't have to give me novocaine because he could do it in a jiffy, pain free. All the way to the dentist's office I had been thinking I was going to get one of those needles in the roof of my mouth and compared to the awfullness of that, the dream I woke up with would seem like a lovely fairytale. He did it, though. He ground a little, he filled a little, he put the blue light on it and polished it and I had a new filling, with no pain and no needle in the roof of my mouth. I celebrated by getting an Americano coffee at the Safeway Starbucks and by buying lettuce, tomatoes and peanut butter and chocolate chip cookie dough!

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With Americano in hand I visited my Mom, as I always do on Wednesdays. I took with me the recent pictures I had Flickr print for me of my two beautiful granddaughters, Alison and Zuzu. I knew Mom would appreciate them and she did. She exclaimed over Zuzu's sweet smile and Alison's wonderful eyes and what a great parent her "sweet little grandson, Christopher" had become. Mom always has the TV on, usually on the classic movie station and today was Charlie Chaplin day. The movie was one from the 50s where Charlie is white-haired and wearing a tuxedo most of the time. A pretty woman came into the scene with a swoopy 50s hat and gorgeous eyes. I didn't recognize her and I'm usually pretty good at recognizing movie people--Mom said, "I think she's Dawn Adams or something like that." I'd never heard of Dawn Adams so I couldn't dispute or corroborate, but later when the credits came up, there was her name, Dawn Adams! At 86 my Mom still impresses with her memory for movie star trivia! I told Mom about my New Jersey travel dream and she responded that she was a little bit glad she wasn't going to Greece with us because she'd been watching the news and being in an airport right now didn't look like much fun to her.

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It's time to go read "John Adams" now (ancestor of Dawn?) and finish my Americano--I can nurse one all day. In a half hour Michael will come home and I'll tell him my dream and accentuate the part about how I knew he would solve all my problems for me. He'll like that.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Brain Teaser

I have a brain again! To explain: have you ever had a cold that compromised the activity of your brain? I have had that cold this past week. What happens in there, I wonder? Is it the gi-hugic quantities of mucous that are being created by the workings of the cold germ? Is the mucous accumulating in my sinus cavities and pressing on the lobes of my brain? Is my brain being strangled by the ropes of green, gunky mucous? Whatever the physical causes, the fact is I felt brain-damaged, in the beginning stages of Alzheimer’s disease, unable to make a coherent thought, remember a word, form a plan. All gone! If this is a little hint of what it’s like to have dementia, I don’t want to live that long!