Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Tony and Slobby

So Slobidau (how the hell do you spell his name--let's just call him Slobby) is dead. Possibly poisoned. There has hardly ever been a time that I was so pleased by someone's death. Oh, too bad says I! Died in jail, heart attack, attack of a hardened heart, small heart, dead heart, black heart. Oh, too bad, Slobby. Yes, I would have preferred that he was drawn and quartered, or hung, or shot by firing squad made up of the people he squashed, but his being dead is a good thing. Now if we could only get rid of Saddam and his courtroom antics. I don't think we should be in Iraq, but I DO think Saddam is bad, bad, bad and should be gone, gone, gone. Maybe someone will poison him, too!

Tony! On the other hand, here is a good fella who is whacking people right and left and we love him. Bookworm could figure out the paralells and the differences, but it seems definitely odd that we hate Saddam and Slobby but love the Tone-man. Judging from my first paragraph above, I guess maybe I'd like to have the power to whack where I think whacking needs to be done. Is that it? Tell me, bloggers. Some of those who were whacked I really liked. I liked Adriana and I liked Tony B. and I liked Pussy. It's the loyalty issue isn't it....the family loyalty. Turn on me, I turn on you. Sometimes I wish I could whack my brother.....

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Oscar, Oscar, Oscar!

Okay…..so…All of my bloggy friends have been writing about the Oscar Awards last Sunday and not a one has mentioned the best part of the whole SHOW! Did you like Jon Stewart? As far as I’m concerned he was The Star of The Night. I love Jon. His cute little smirk thrills me. His deader than deadpan delights me. He’s My Guy! He went out there and he did his make fun of anybody on the planet shtick and I don’t care if the first 5 rows of “stars” only politely clapped and smiled only enough not to crack their makeup (or facelifts), because he did what had to be done. He poked holes in their huge balloon-like egos! Okay, there were a couple who laughed hardily, Jamie Foxx for one. I think Gorgeous George Clooney was laughing but it was kind of hard to tell. He rolled his eyes lots, but I think he and Jon were making eye contact.

Bookworn and Brownshoes mentioned CLASS. Jon has Class with a Capital C!! I agree that Clooney has Class, too.

Aside from Jon, here is what I remember fondly:
Uma Thurman looking thinly, blondly, tall-ly fabulous.
Salma Hyak So Sexy She Sizzled.
A woman with flapping arms just like me, and everyone I know, accepting an award and looking just like me and everyone I know would look if we had to get up on that stage and accept an award. A normal person dressed up, who didn’t go to the gym for 6 hours everyday and didn’t have a makeup man and a hairdo man and a pedicure man and a manicure man and a man to give us the toilet paper and a man to open the door and a man to give us thousands, even millions of dollars worth of jewelry to wear. And THAT woman probably would have really appreciated one of those opulent gift bags!!! I hope she got one!
Jack Nicholson slyly grinning from the front row as always. I’m gonna really miss Jack when he’s not there anymore.
The woman who nearly fell out of her strapless orangey-rust colored dress when she leaped up because her group had won an award—maybe it was Best Picture for Crash. She was so exuberant and happy and pretty, that she made me happy. She wasn’t a “star”.
Poor, vain Lauren Bacall, who eschewed her glasses and made a damned fool of herself.
Lovely Jennifer Something, who is in Alien on TV and married Ben Affleck, nearly taking a nose dive and recovering sweetly. I love her dimples.
Dolly Parton, with the 10 inch waist and the knockers that could conquer the world, not being able to get the crowd going until she took control and started strutting the stage.
Joaquin Phoenix, who made a believer out of me (in his talent) by BEING Johnny Cash, beaming when Reese Witherspoon received her award.
Reese’s speech which, incredibly, made sense. I thought, “she must be pretty smart to actually be able to give a good acceptance speech”.
Lily and Meryl being Altmanish.
Altman being a dignified older man who deserved an Oscar.
The incredible surge of electricity and excitement that went through the crowd when Crash won best picture.
Phillip Seymour Hoffman, who I have loved for a long, long time, getting best actor. How sweet it is!
And I loved the hilarious stuff that Jon and his crew did with the “ads” for best actress.
That’s enough I guess. I have watched the Academy Awards since I was a wee little kid because my Mom loves movies and “the stars” and I inherited that. I won’t ever apologize for watching, I won’t ever feel guilty. I love it and that’s that! It’s always a pleasure but never a guilty one!